How to love,

That love, is for you.

Hi blog, i missed you! Hahhah its been awhile since i last updated my blog. 

Okay my blog were abandoned quite a long time, and now im gonna start writing what i feel to write. Well as you all know, im one of the spm candidates this year. Yeah THIS YEAR. Lagi sebulan je okay nak SPM :(

I dont think that i studied hard this year, i dont know lah. But i dont feel like i struggled this year. But bila time PMR dulu, i really can feel the stress fullness okay. But not this year. Stress pasal benda lain ade lah.

Okay im gonna start writing about this thing that made me happy and sad at the same time. It's about a guy. I've been falling for this guy since March this year. We're in the same school though. Well, its simple. I like him, but he doesn't know about it. And i dont know when is the right time to tell him. I cant find a reason to describe why did i like him. Is this love? But i tried to give some hint, through Facebook status, songs that i put on my wall, through text, and through chat but he still didnt get it. I tried asking my friend's opinion and advice, and they were all the same. Well, i think most of them asked me to be honest to him and tell him that i like him. Well, it took me quite some time to think about it. I dont think you will read my blog, so here is my confession to you :)

For you boy ,

   Is it so hard for you to know that i do really like you, Mr. R? I really tried my best to let you know, but i'm so afraid. Every time that confident side of me came, i still dont have that enough courage to tell you. I dont easily fall for a guy, but when i did, i fell really hard. 

Every little thing that you did to me, it means a lot to me. It could made my day. Every conversation that we made, somehow when i read it back, it made me smile. Even though you treated me not like how i want it to be, i dont mind. I dont mind when you replied 'k', 'haha', ':)', 'dah' , 'belum' . I dont mind when you ignored my texts. I dont mind when you dont approach me first. I dont mind when you dont even say hi to me at school. I dont mind when you made me feel like a hopeless and pathetic person. I dont mind when you replied a short text to me. I just dont mind, get it? And its because of you. Just you. Sometimes you gave me hope and hints too, but then on the next day you seems so different. You made me confused too boy :/ . When i got dumped and i thought like there's no reason fr me to smile again, you proved me wrong. By just knowing you, i feel so special. Maybe you dont realize it, but i do. Every time i see your pictures, i hear your name, i saw you was walking in front of me at school, get a text and a reply from you, it actually made me smile :) 

Well, isn't it obvious that im really falling for you? I dont understand why you still dont get it? But it's okay, i cant force you to do anything right. I wanted to say to you that i care for you, i like you, and i want you. I want to know you more. I want to discover this feelings. This feelings towards you. And please, can you notice all the hints that i gave to you. Please? If not now, then when right.

Asia Tour

Its been a long time since i last update my blog. Well, i've been busy with my schools and tuitions. And especially with all the dramas that happened in my life. Senior years is a drama year i think?

So, i just wanted to write about what had happened to me that i still can remember. Firstly, i went to karaoke with my girls last friday. That was my first time ever, went to a karaoke room! And yeah, i had lots of fun that time, released all my tension by singing a sad song, clubbing song, and shuffle song! Heee! :)
Then secondly, for 3 times in a row i watched Harry Potter with my sister since she won the tickets to watch Harry Potter 1 till Harry Potter 6 the first part. And thirdly, i went to Liverpool's training session last thursday! What a lucky girl i am right? I was sleeping that time, then i got a call from Idlan saying that Iman has another one pass to Liverpool's training. So i was like so blur that time and i realized that Liverpool was here in Malaysia! Hahaha then i said okay without telling my parents first. Then when i was in the car, i texted my dad. Was so excited that time even though i didnt support that team, cause im a red devils fan! But i just want to watch them live. Went there with Iman, Idlan, Iman's brother and Iman's sister's friend. I had so much fun that time. But i felt guilty with the person who brought us there, he paid all the tolls . I should've brought my Touch N Go that time, so he wont have to pay anything. Dah la menumpang kita orang ni, tapi tk keluarkan duit pun.

So that's it. Itu je yang bole ingat. Hahha and now i'm planning to go to Chelsea's game next week, on Tuesday their training, and on Wednesday their game. Im gonna get my free ticket and passes hopefully. By collecting the Star Newspaper from 14th July till 17th July, then have to redeem on monday. First come, first serve. Tengah nak carik lagi sape boleh tolong pegi redeemkan on monday morning nanti. Insyallah dapat :)

Fragile?

Tau ape yang fragile ? My heart. Yes, my heart.

Kedah kedah kedah!

Ahhh  i am sooo excited! I'm going to Kedah for 2 days. Know why am i so excitedd? Cause i never been to that place, and this is my first time! I can actually learn their accent ;) Da lame rase nk dengar orang Kedah cakap2, teheee! And yeah, bole jumpa banyak 'Kembang' kat sane. * sape yang tengok cerita Cun je yang faham :)

Well, June is treating me well i think. Its gonna be a good June, Insyallah. And this morning i had a very touching moment. Webcam-ed with him for like 2 hours, and on the phone with him too. It's been a while since we talked like that. Cracked jokes together, laughing together, made fun of each other and the last thing is stare in each other's eyes. Well walaupun webcam je pun kan :')

I was so happy that time. I've been missing him and at last i got the chance to see his face again. I am moving on, but like i said in my last entry before this, there is still a tiny pieces of my past and him in me. Tiny? Hmmm i think soo. I am really tired of crying, being sad, feeling lonely and all. And i promised to myself that i am not gonna let anyone make me feel that way again. 

Okay enough with that, imma talk about Lee Min Ho now. Oh mai god, i think i am falling in love with him! I actually sacrificed my sleep and my precious time to study, watching Boys Over Flower and Personal Taste. Sanggup okay tak tido and tido lambat just to watch himmm? Hihihi sampai nak pegi Kedah ni pun sanggup save gambar2 dia and transfer dlm phone takut rindu ;) . I like his acting in both of the stories. Dua dua cerita dia berlakon jadi lelaki yang sangat romantic and sweet and gentleman! Ahh mane tak cair tengok kan? I would love to have a guy like him as my soulmate. Insyallah kan? 

Okay imma blog when i have a time to do so. Kedah, here i comeeee! :)

New month, new day!

Happy June people! May this month give us happiness and joyfulness :) 

Wipe away my tears,

This past few days, i always felt like i was alone. Alone in my own world.

I felt like there was no one with me, and that was just too hurtful.

I often think of the people who i miss.

I think of all the bad memories.

I think of how much tears that i've wasted.

I think of the people who had broke my heart.

I think of all the hard times that i've been through.

Well i can say that this holidays is such a bad holidays for me.

Cause it made me thinks of all the pains.

I should be moving on by now right?

Yeah, i've moved on with my life. But there's just a tiny pieces of my past left inside of me.

And i really dont know how to get rid of it.

I prayed to God everyday to give me strength for me to continue my journey.

I want to be strong, i have to be strong, and i will be strong.

I cant let other people's selfishness control me.

I am not gonna let the past haunts me anymore. 

I realized that people should start to be happy and stop being sad.

You know why? Because this life aint a place for us to keep being sad and cry.

We should enjoy and appreciate this life. But dont ever cross the limits.

"Hidup ni tak bermakna kalau kita buat orang yang kita sayang sedih"

I really like this quotes. It means something to me :')

And i really hope to all the heartbreakers out there, please come to your senses. Sedarkan diri tu please.

Stop hurting people, mentally and physically.

Quote tu tak semestinya untuk boyf/girlf je, it can be for your parents, your siblings, your cousins, your friends. 

And yes, just keep smiling and held your head up high.

Dont ever give up on something that you like.

Follow your heart, and your brain too!

P/S: Sorry if message dalam ni bercampur campur, cause i really dont know how to organize my words. What i felt and what i thought, i just write. So yeah :')

Ignorance,

I dont know what to write, so im just gonna upload some random pictures of me with the people that i miss :)

My lovely cousin, Aliff and Ada.

Amalina and Aisyah, rindu hangout same2!

I miss this two crackhead too, Sam and Dan. I just miss our old times.

I miss you both too, Hazirah and Aina!

Faci2 kat UIA! Saya rindu kamu semua :')

Mereka2 di JB, sangat rindu okay :')

3 budak yang selalu buat saya gelak, Aliff, Apek and Farish. Imissyou!

Cousin 2 orang ni, Wanie dan Amer. Rindu jugak :)

Those cheerful kids that i miss in Singapore <3

My favorite cousin too, Kak Fara! Rindu, bila nk jumpa and story2?

There is some reason i putted this photo. I miss you so damn much :')

Haaa ini budak Kelantan! Hihi i miss you so much Ainaa :D

This cuties. Aqish, Alia and Raudhah :)