How to love,

That love, is for you.

Hi blog, i missed you! Hahhah its been awhile since i last updated my blog. 

Okay my blog were abandoned quite a long time, and now im gonna start writing what i feel to write. Well as you all know, im one of the spm candidates this year. Yeah THIS YEAR. Lagi sebulan je okay nak SPM :(

I dont think that i studied hard this year, i dont know lah. But i dont feel like i struggled this year. But bila time PMR dulu, i really can feel the stress fullness okay. But not this year. Stress pasal benda lain ade lah.

Okay im gonna start writing about this thing that made me happy and sad at the same time. It's about a guy. I've been falling for this guy since March this year. We're in the same school though. Well, its simple. I like him, but he doesn't know about it. And i dont know when is the right time to tell him. I cant find a reason to describe why did i like him. Is this love? But i tried to give some hint, through Facebook status, songs that i put on my wall, through text, and through chat but he still didnt get it. I tried asking my friend's opinion and advice, and they were all the same. Well, i think most of them asked me to be honest to him and tell him that i like him. Well, it took me quite some time to think about it. I dont think you will read my blog, so here is my confession to you :)

For you boy ,

   Is it so hard for you to know that i do really like you, Mr. R? I really tried my best to let you know, but i'm so afraid. Every time that confident side of me came, i still dont have that enough courage to tell you. I dont easily fall for a guy, but when i did, i fell really hard. 

Every little thing that you did to me, it means a lot to me. It could made my day. Every conversation that we made, somehow when i read it back, it made me smile. Even though you treated me not like how i want it to be, i dont mind. I dont mind when you replied 'k', 'haha', ':)', 'dah' , 'belum' . I dont mind when you ignored my texts. I dont mind when you dont approach me first. I dont mind when you dont even say hi to me at school. I dont mind when you made me feel like a hopeless and pathetic person. I dont mind when you replied a short text to me. I just dont mind, get it? And its because of you. Just you. Sometimes you gave me hope and hints too, but then on the next day you seems so different. You made me confused too boy :/ . When i got dumped and i thought like there's no reason fr me to smile again, you proved me wrong. By just knowing you, i feel so special. Maybe you dont realize it, but i do. Every time i see your pictures, i hear your name, i saw you was walking in front of me at school, get a text and a reply from you, it actually made me smile :) 

Well, isn't it obvious that im really falling for you? I dont understand why you still dont get it? But it's okay, i cant force you to do anything right. I wanted to say to you that i care for you, i like you, and i want you. I want to know you more. I want to discover this feelings. This feelings towards you. And please, can you notice all the hints that i gave to you. Please? If not now, then when right.